


Save Me, Break Me

by Lionwingz



Series: things aren’t always what they seem [2]
Category: Kamen Rider Decade
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Internalized Victim Blaming, M/M, This is still Axesuke’s Tsukasa, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:48:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29903406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lionwingz/pseuds/Lionwingz
Summary: An awful possibility for a Tsukasa who trusted himself to a Yuusuke who is far less kind
Relationships: Kadoya Tsukasa/Onodera Yuusuke
Series: things aren’t always what they seem [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2198802
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	Save Me, Break Me

**Author's Note:**

> And I’m back with a part two! This is my first series so let’s see how it goes

Tsukasa knows this isn’t right. He figured out that Yuusuke’s just using him, but what can he say? It’s Yuusuke. And Yuusuke does want to help people. That’s what he says with each suggestion, each promise, each hit. Maybe Tsukasa is weak for taking it, but what else can you do?

It’s lonely, at the top. So lonely, but whenever he needs it, whenever it tries to consume him, Yuusuke is there.

Yuusuke was there when Sayo turned on him, he was there to warn Tsukasa of every coup, he was there when Daiki killed himself. He stayed, he stayed loyal, and he kept that kind smile. He’s helped Tsukasa keep going every time he wants to collapse, no matter how hard the push is.

And maybe… maybe Tsukasa isn’t a good person. If he was, why would he keep failing? Yuusuke cares so much, all he’s ever done is respond when Tsukasa is cruel, or when he fails. When Tsukasa is good, Yuusuke is as kind as the day Tsukasa met him. That’s why he’d liked Daiki and why he needs Yuusuke now. They were able to… to help him. Yes, Daiki had been used before, but he was so good, and Tsukasa had tried to help…

He hadn’t helped enough, though. Or else Daiki wouldn’t have killed himself.

Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed Daiki so much. It’s definitely easier when he doesn’t push Yuusuke.

Things aren’t even always bad, sometimes he will go out with Yuusuke, see the good that has occurred, or just go into the garden and take picture of Yuusuke’s still radiant smile. Sometimes he really is happy, and he forgets his guilt. He forgets when Yuusuke is harsh, he forgets all of his failures.

But then there’s other times, when he’s alone, when he’s looking out into the Worlds Sayo had first discovered so long ago, and he thinks, if he tried hard enough, he could push through the veils and he free of it all. The guilt, the responsibility, and even…

(Even Yuusuke.)

The veils never give. Tsukasa keeps them his secret.

And there’s nowhere on the world that he rules to escape to.

Not… not that he wants to escape. He doesn’t. He’s doing good now, now that he’s close to ruling the world. And Yuusuke says that’s right, so it must be. It has to be. Yuusuke looked so upset that Tsukasa was doubting, and that’s worse than when he does something that makes the other angry.

He knows by now, Yuusuke is using him. But he doesn’t care. It’s easier to close his eyes and pretend. To know that the good is worth the pain.

To forget that he’d somehow twisted this kind man into something monstrous.

Every bit of his suffering is deserved.


End file.
